Who's Her Daddy?
MONSTER went out showjumping at the weekend. This is the first time in a year she's been out. RIDER got the glory of course.
I was visiting friends in Yorkshire Sunday morning so it was left to RIDER to suit and boot her and throw her on the wagon. I drove back from friends and met RIDER at the venue. MONSTER was pleased to see me.
RIDER signed her name for the 75cm class and while she got ready I climbed in back of the wagon and tacked MONSTER up. She was a cutie in the collecting ring, butI think she's forgotten what she's supposed to do. About two strides out from the warm up fences she would stoop, almost as if to peer for a ground line. This left her heavily on the forehand just as she should be getting her back legs under her.
In the arena she gave RIDER a good round. The traverse in canter around fence 3 would have been impressive if it was a deliberate dressage movement instead of naughtiness.
By the time the 85cm round came along she was enjoying herself. She had two untidy knock downs but the idea had finally got back into her thick skull that jumping can be fun.
Once back at stables I untacked her and was stood in her stable talking to friends while she rubbed her head on me. Tack itches so much. Then it went quiet. I turned round to see the fat lass start rolling belly up behind me. Being in her stable while all her legs are in the air is not the safest place to be.
Monday morning RIDER put her on the lunge. I walked up to the paddocks with THE TWO DOGS just as the session started. A winter of fat rippled on MONSTER shoulders as she demonstrated her floaty trot. She responded to voice commads. She did some 2 beat canter. I know, I know. Canter SHOULD be a 3 beat pace. Can comeone please inform MONSTER. She came back into trot on demand.
Then I left.
MONSTER bucked, farted and proceeded to gallop round in circles for 30 minutes ignoring all RIDERs commands.
This fat tart knows how to put on a show for her daddy, and take the mick out of everyone else.
I was visiting friends in Yorkshire Sunday morning so it was left to RIDER to suit and boot her and throw her on the wagon. I drove back from friends and met RIDER at the venue. MONSTER was pleased to see me.
RIDER signed her name for the 75cm class and while she got ready I climbed in back of the wagon and tacked MONSTER up. She was a cutie in the collecting ring, butI think she's forgotten what she's supposed to do. About two strides out from the warm up fences she would stoop, almost as if to peer for a ground line. This left her heavily on the forehand just as she should be getting her back legs under her.
In the arena she gave RIDER a good round. The traverse in canter around fence 3 would have been impressive if it was a deliberate dressage movement instead of naughtiness.
By the time the 85cm round came along she was enjoying herself. She had two untidy knock downs but the idea had finally got back into her thick skull that jumping can be fun.
Once back at stables I untacked her and was stood in her stable talking to friends while she rubbed her head on me. Tack itches so much. Then it went quiet. I turned round to see the fat lass start rolling belly up behind me. Being in her stable while all her legs are in the air is not the safest place to be.
Monday morning RIDER put her on the lunge. I walked up to the paddocks with THE TWO DOGS just as the session started. A winter of fat rippled on MONSTER shoulders as she demonstrated her floaty trot. She responded to voice commads. She did some 2 beat canter. I know, I know. Canter SHOULD be a 3 beat pace. Can comeone please inform MONSTER. She came back into trot on demand.
Then I left.
MONSTER bucked, farted and proceeded to gallop round in circles for 30 minutes ignoring all RIDERs commands.
This fat tart knows how to put on a show for her daddy, and take the mick out of everyone else.
posted by Nick on Wednesday, February 16, 2005
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